Government spending plans bolstered by borrowing binge.

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If borrowing more money than you can ever pay back, or QE as it’s known, is good enough for the government then it’s good enough for everyone claims another bizarrely named think tank.

Blue Sky Thinking, the independent think tank, claims that thanks to miserable people borrowing more money on loans and credit cards than ever before, to buy more useless iShit, growth in consumer spending is making it look like the government hasn’t entirely fucked us all over.

Shane Mcgiveren from Kirkcaldy said; I was getting anxious as I hadn’t been into the Apple store for two days, but thanks to the bank writing to me to say I could spend another £5k if I wanted to, I thought fuck-it, might as well get another iWatch as my other one is three weeks old now and people are taking the piss out of it.”

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